Name: Spare Brain |
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| Week 12 Assignment Status: Spare Brain is the only employee not to be terminated and winner of the Office Survival 4 contest. Week 11 Assignment Status: Task: 
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECTOpinion Response: Two Words: Duct Tape I would sneak in early with the appropriate materials, remove the duct tape, and repair it. I have NO IDEA what all that left over sticky stuff is! Was someone messing with these files?! Week 10 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Spare Brain (no vote submitted) Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECTOpinion Response: First look for a worthy receptable, if all else fails, straight down. If I know my boss... I know who has to clean it up.... my boss is SUCH a slacker... Week 9 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Lancer Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECT Opinion Response: Make iced lemonaide, and take over to them. Have had some lemonaide koolaide in the cupboard for awhile now, might as well get rid of it now. Say you're sorry your husband isn't home to help out, but you made them some lemonaide. Later, call hubby and tell him it would probably be a good idea to work late, and ask if he could bring home some more lemonaide. Week 8 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Gusto Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECT Opinion Response: Immediately pour smoothie all over the OUTside of the envelope, completely saturating ALL documents and their envelopes. Stuff and reseal, you never opened it. The envelopes must have leaked. As for the smoothie, it was actually on the dash board of your car where you're child placed it last night and left it. As a matter of fact you HEROICALLY avoided an accident that caused the smoothie to slide forward and splash the envelope. After your life threatening incident, you HOPE that the documents INSIDE are not marred, and you're really very sorry but after all, you were saving CHILDREN and small animals with your swerve.... Offer to iron out the papers IF damaged.... Week 7 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Rowan Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECTOpinion Response: No. There is a HUGE difference between being a slacker and being a crook. No plan is fool proof .... you know about it, don't you? Suddenly, it's not so fool proof anymore, is it? Week 6 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Zeeee Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECTOpinion Response: At first be really disoriented, and confused. Blink a lot. Walk crooked, but insist you are OK, and a good sport. You don't want to push this too far, but you can probably milk it with severe headaches for the next few days and maybe get home early, AND meekly ask if you can come in late tomorrow. Never iunderestimate the power of the guilt trip. Week 5 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Adam Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
CORRECTOpinion Response: Ok, busted, but never put off to the next day what you can take care of right now! Promptly enlist the help of the wait staff using reverse psychological tactical civil warfare I like to call 'us against them'. Oh my that must have been an serious mistake you made there, could they possibly please credit that account (may involve the need to call the account company) and put it on THIS card instead. Using the 'us against them' method puts the wait staff on your side, (plus an extra 20 slipped unobtrusivly) and can help you cya. The next day, look surprised and alarmed that someone would 'try to get you in trouble' that way, but surly it must be some mistake, as you were having an anniversary dinner at your own expense. Oh yes, that's right! You HAD accidently charged it to the account, BUT you recognized your mistake and immeadiatly remedied it. Then go on about how SOME people are just ITCHING to cause trouble it seems ...... Week 4 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Crystal Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
COMPLETEOpinion Response: I would throw something on, borrow my room-mate's cell(Who has caller ID Blocking), and go to the street almost in the middle of traffic and tell her I am calling from a pay phone on the side of the street because someone was just nice enough to give me change and call her, AND they are changing my tire. Then, act guilty and sorry I am late, while at the same time gushing about how NICE people can be... Week 3 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Spare Brain Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:  INCORRECTOpinion Response: This is when you show your support and assure your boss that you will *be there* 100%, AND why you should ALWAYS keep your mini vacations a secret. Also, another reason to keep those copies of death certifcates around. A scanner, photo copier and photoshop can do WONDERS to names/dates. Of course please keep track of how many grandmothers a person can reasonably have. Good rule of thumb, mom remarried twice, dad three times. Dysfunctional families are the norm now. Week 2 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Had Monday off last week, no vote Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
COMPLETEOpinion Response: The good thing about being an admin is people are casual with their passwords around you. Sometimes they even give so you can do some work for them, or you know them so well you KNOW their pet's name. Under the guise of 'working late' you can casually go through their email with the info you need. This works, this is how I found out about my boss's transfer a month before it was announced. Week 1 Assignment Status: Voted To Fire: Shamu Task:
COMPLETEQuestion:
COMPLETEOpinion Response: Step 1> Exert same levels of annoyance and outrage plus .5% Step 2> Say "Oh I know right?! Those drivers will just throw those things anywhere like they own the place!" Step 3> Offer to draw up a memo to be CC'd the delivery drivers about the 'Proper Disposal of Cigarette Butts' Step 4> Covertly alert friend to occasionally change brands of cigarettes to keep up the ruse, AND/OR slip them a copy of the memo Registration Question: "Your best friend (and co-worker) has been seen idling at the mall on company time by the company snitch. What do you do to help your friend out of this untimely jam?" Spare Brain's Response: "I had such a major headache from caffinee withdrawel and the company soda machine is broken! I asked him to go to the Star Bucks in the mall and picks us up some, we even pithced in to get you one! Well, appearently the machine was broken there and they were in the middle of fixing it, but it was expected to only take about ten minutes so when he called on the cell I asked him to wait. He was obviously just waiting to get you some coffee, boss....." |
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